I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
Randomize
