Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
Randomize
