Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize
