found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
Never let your siblings swipe right.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
