I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Randomize
