Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
Randomize
