I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
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