Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
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