You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Randomize
