i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
