Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
bring money and cleavage
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
Randomize