The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
