But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
I have two black x marks on my hands.
Yep you got cut off last night after a stripper bent over in front of you and you screamed very loudly 'I can see your soul from here'
damnit I wish I could remember that.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
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