My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
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