You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
Randomize
