BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
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