come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
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