my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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