omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
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