Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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