Rock
Scissors
Fuck
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
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