Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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