The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
