New invention idea: vibrating tampons
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
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