He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
Randomize
