There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
