how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
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