I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
I came so hard my ears popped.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
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