You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
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