6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
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