She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
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