I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
The shit I just took was my body's way of telling me bourbon and mixed nuts aren't an appropriate dinner. Well played, colon. WELL. PLAYED.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
Randomize
