It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
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