Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
Randomize
