Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
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