Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
Randomize
