So drunk, too bad you don't want this
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
Randomize
