Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
