what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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