Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
This baby is an asshole
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Randomize
