he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
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