Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
Randomize
