found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Randomize
