btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
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