i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
You pole danced in your parka.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
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