capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Randomize
