So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
