no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize
