I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Randomize
