True but thats because hes a fetus.
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
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